The One with Mrs. Katherine's tattoo.

Why don't I have a tattoo, you ask?

How can I be trusted to pick something that I like now and will like forever (except for Keith)? I picked psychology as a major in college; that was a pretty expensive and time-consuming decision, and I have since changed my mind. One day I picked out a chrome and maple coffee table, and by the time it was delivered my tastes had completely changed. A few months ago, I was dying to cut my hair short. Finally, after thinking about it long and hard, I did. I loved it too, but now I'm ready to grow it out again.

Where would I put it? First of all, it would have to be somewhere hidden so that I won't have to explain to random people when they comment on it that my tastes have changed, and I don't like it, blah, blah, blah. And, of course, my mother can't ever know it's there. But still, where would I put it? I can't even decide where to keep my Dustbuster.

And finally, what will happen to it, you know, later? Will it drift down with other things? I could say that it won't and vow to work out forever to keep my skin nice and taut. That would kind of be like when I cut my hair off short a couple of months ago and vowed to use my hairdryer and flat iron everyday to keep my hair nice and stylish. It's not going to happen. And not only sagging, but what about spotting? Will age spots one day make me look like I have a chocolate chip cookie tattooed on my rear?

I think it's best if I just stay away from the tattoo parlor.